Victoria —

Every day, I see Barack make choices he knows will affect every American family. That’s no small task for anyone — and more proof that he’s earning every last one of those gray hairs. The way I figure it, he’s spent at least $100 billion of your Grand children’s tax dollars for each and every one of those gray hairs.  

 

 

This has been a busy week in Washington. Barack has gotten out on the golf course only a couple of times and we’re still planning our next big vacation before the 2012 election, but today happens to be Barack’s 50th birthday. I’m writing to you because this year, the girls and I would like to do something a little different. Yes, we’d like to ask you for money in a different way!

I’m asking friends and supporters of this campaign to wish him a happy birthday by signing his card, and sharing why you’re on this journey with us. We’ve never actually done a card for Barack before. Usually it’s just a run of the mill money tree. This year, however, we’re asking you to sign the card and then sign over your credit card number as well. We’re trying to raise a $1 billion in campaign donations! That money together with that boat load of dough the Republicans let him have in the debt ceiling debate ought to give him enough ‘walking around money’ to distribute to his friends in the unions. Gosh, with this kind of money we can reconstitute ACORN! Buy another network (isn’t Jeff Immelt doing a great job for us?) and get George to set us up another Media Matters or Organizing for America website. The possibilities are endless! 

Your names and notes will become part of a book that tells the story of this campaign — who’s building it, why we’re in this thing, and what he means to us. We’ll deliver a copy to Barack and send one to our campaign offices across the country. Then Barack will use all your names in all of his future speeches. It will go something like this: “Loretta Braindead of Wackinack, New Jersey sent me this well wish, ‘I was in my home and Barack Obama gave me a new kitchen. Those men in those purple shirts from the union untied me so I could use it after I promised to sign over all my social security checks to Barack Hussein Obama and all his friends at C.A.S.H. They’re so nice!’ That’s right, we’ll WIN THE FUTURE with people like Loretta here.”

Sign the card for Barack.

I’ve known Barack for more than 20 of his 50 years, and we’ve been through quite a lot together. We’ve sat in that church for 20 years together. Learned chemistry experiments from his old pal Bill Ayers. And learned the art of the deal from Barack’s good friend Tony Rezko, or, as we like to call him, Inmate 78383875116.

It still amazes me that no matter how many decisions and distractions he’s faced with every day, he’s always able to focus on the bigger picture. For instance, he doesn’t just want to play the course at Andrews Air Force base. No, he’s played that course, what, 80 times so far? No, his vistas go far beyond that course. He can’t wait to play Pebble Beach on the taxpayer dime. He looks forward to the day when he can tee off at St. Andrews. One way he does that is by making time for stories and letters from people like you — because he knows that this job isn’t about him, Oh, come on, who am I kidding? Of course it’s all about him! He’s a petulant single child raised up by a bunch of doting adults who kept telling him how smart and special he was. Of COURSE he thinks it’s about him but he says it’s really all about the millions of folks around the country he’s fighting for. Of course your fight may be different from his fight. You may want to keep your own money for instance, but Barrack has different plans. Because he’s fighting for all those millions of folks, he wants to take YOUR money and give it to one of them. That’s special, right?

This next year will challenge us all to work harder than ever before, but the crucial thing is that you’re here now, early on, helping to build this campaign. He’s only in year three of Cloward Piven and he’s almost done destroying the US economy. Please send him money so he can complete the job!

I know that, like Barack and me, you have your own reasons why, so I hope you’ll take a moment to sign the card and share your story with him and other supporters of this campaign.

http://my.barackobama.com/Birthday-Card

Thanks for being a part of this destruction of American exceptionalism and ending the relationship the individual has with their government and advancing the cause of the cadres and the collective! 

Your Comrade,

Michelle