I don’t know whether to be sad or laugh out loud. This is the City of Portland’s latest “playground.”  These City-provided photos reveal the “first-ever venture into nature play structures [is] a new and current trend in sustainable, environmentally-friendly play areas.”

“The Spring Garden nature play area is constructed of natural and recycled materials such as trees and rocks. “

You could have done this yourself with a chain saw and Bobcat, but no matter. The “play equipment” consists of:
One log, tree stumps and the tops of six boulders. Look at the pictures. Count them yourself.

We decided on the program yesterday that the stand of stumps resembles stonehenge. The log was “donated” by Tri Met after they whacked the trees along an avenue they’ll stick unaffordable light rail on.

In addition, TriMet donated a tree from their property on Lincoln Street to supply wood and materials to the project.  The tree had to be removed during construction of TriMet’s Portland-Milwaukie Light Rail project. 

Umpqua Bank donated the money to build the playground.

Park’s Commissioner, Nick Fish, says the playground at 3332 SW Spring Garden Street may remind adults of the imaginative play from their youth.

That was in the days before the regional cossacks known as Metro. Back then you could have your own big back yard, rain wasn’t a pollutant if it fell on your property, you could cut down your own trees without a permit and trees didn’t have ‘rights’ (please see Commissioner Dan Saltzman about his belief that “Trees have rights. Trees, trees, have rights.”

Precious Portland. Have fun kids.